Pickin’ and Choosin’

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am i a hoarder, am i apathetic, am I concerned about lost people, am I giving to others as I should be, do I care about lost people, do I care if someone knows Jesus, do I hoard, God's blessings are meant to be shared, helping people, hoarding, how to tell if you are apathetic, loving people, people who hoard, religion, sharing God's gifts, truth

Several months ago I saw a Facebook post come across my feed that said, “Half the world is starving while the other half is trying to lose weight.”

It definitely made me think about the physical starvation of people, but it was like a punch in the gut when I thought about the spiritual side of things.

Most of us pick and choose our Christianity like we pick and choose items off of a buffet.

Millions have never even heard the name of Jesus, yet I decide which teacher I like best, which ministry I’ll support and which translation of the Bible I deem as appropriate to study from. I gorge myself and then look around in condescension on those who aren’t choosing the same things off the menu as I am.

Meanwhile, in the real world, others are starving to hear the Word. They are hungry and trying to fill their empty plates with anything that even seems like it might fit.

What am I doing? I’m standing in the line at the buffet.

Desperate people are simply trying to find the door to the restaurant while my back is turned refilling my plate over and over.

Can you tell I’m a little mad at myself? I’m actually sickened. I’m sickened by my excuses and lack of love.

Oswald J. Smith said, “No one has the right to hear the Gospel twice, while there remains someone who has not heard it once.”

Hudson Taylor said, “Perhaps if there were more of that intense distress for souls that leads to tears, we should more frequently see the results we desire. Sometimes it may be that while we are complaining of the hardness of the hearts of those we are seeking to benefit, the hardness of our own hearts and our feeble apprehension of the solemn reality of eternal things may be the true cause of our want of success.”

I find myself getting into lulls with praying for the lost. Sometimes, it’s an intense burden to pray for individuals by name, literally begging God to break through a particular heart so they will receive Him. At other times though, it’s as if I’ve never met a lost person in my life. I’m clueless, and heartless, and a day becomes a week before I mention a lost soul in my prayers once again. Am I not doing Bible study during this lull? Am I not going to church? Am I not memorizing Scripture with my youngest? Am I not writing the blog? The crazy thing is that I AM! Don’t worry… I’m still at the buffet filling my own plate. Apparently, I’m just not willing to share.

I’m finding that Hudson Taylor must be right. It’s my own hardness of heart that stops the growth of Christianity in my generation. Where’s the distress over souls?!What is wrong with me?! Have I become narcissistic in my Christianity? Is there such a thing? How can I be a Christian and obsessed with myself? Isn’t that impossible? If I’m a “little Christ”, aren’t I obsessed with others and dying to self daily?“O wretched man that I am! Who shall deliver me from the body of this death?” (Romans 7:24)

The very next verse of Romans 7 says that only Jesus Christ can deliver me and oh, I know that’s true. He’s delivered me over and over again. He’s replaced this hard heart so many times I’ve lost count. I’m so thankful He never gives up on me. I am so thankful that He has convicted me once again and is reminding me of the millions who have yet to know Him. I thank Him that He does not want one soul to perish without Him (2 Peter 3:9). I thank Him that He is the Good Shepherd that continues to find the one little lost lamb (Matthew 18:11-14).

I am thankful for this buffet that He has for me, but I need to remember that I have been given this buffet to lure others in. The tantalizing aromas of grace and love must be all over me so that others want to come and partake as well. I have been able to taste and see that the Lord is good (Psalm 34:8) so that I can point others to the choicest meat. I’m supposed to share with others who are starving and not simply sit around looking at another person in line at the buffet talking about how good everything is. Yes, I am supposed to feed myself, but only so I can have the strength to feed others. That’s what this buffet is really for…to sustain us all, not just one, or two.

I’m reminded of the time when Jesus fed the massive multitude of over 5,000 people with two fish and five loaves of bread (Matthew 14). He commanded His disciples to share and not hoard it. Can you imagine the rebuke they would have gotten had they just hoarded it away and kept it all for themselves? Such a thing is laughable to us because we know the hungry crowd was right in front of them, but isn’t the hungry crowd in front of us as well?

We have been given so much more than two fish and five loaves. He has commanded us to go and share, but we have become hoarders of God’s provision. I know in my own life… I’m sick of smelling the fish. When I am tight-fisted with God’s buffet, no one benefits, including myself. Blessings are meant to be shared.

When did we get so scared of losing what God has given us to begin with? 

As I stare at my buffet of Bibles, talents, study guides and so much more, I have to ask my Lord what the next step is. Would you be willing to do the same? We all have our own buffet of provision. How does God want you to share yours?

“Half the world is starving while the other half is trying to lose weight.”

It’s a real shame that this statement has become so true when all along the food has been for us all. Thank God for His provision today, but let’s stop pickin’ and choosin’ and get to sharin’ instead.

Seeking Hearts Ministries

My Story with Christ

** Picture from Noka’s Lavish Buffet Spread

 

 

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It’s All in a Voice

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am I hearing God, can I really hear God, Christianity, distinguishing god's voice, encouragement, hearing God, how to hear God, how to hear God's voice, how to know God's voice, is this God, listen to His voice, religion, truth

I was listening to a local radio station yesterday and actually recognized a voice that I hadn’t heard in quite some time. Even though said person was not a usual radio personality, I knew instantly who it was.

My youngest and I were talking about this later…how you can instantly recognize voices. Every voice is unique, like a fingerprint. He went on to say that even really good impressionists don’t sound exactly like the original.

As I was thinking about all of this, I realized that some impressionists have fooled me… for a time. The more I listened though, the more I realized something was “off”, and I knew they were a fake. As Gabe and I were talking I said, “If you listen long enough, and you know the voice well enough, you can always tell.”

Hmmm.

If you listen long enough, and know the voice well enough, you can always tell.

That’s the key in knowing God’s voice, isn’t it? Listening long enough, and knowing His voice well enough.

It made me remember all the times where I have been so impatient. I wanted to hear God’s voice, but I wanted to hear it quickly. After all, I had a lot to do that day.

It made me remember all the times where I thought I heard His voice because it sounded just like I thought it would, and it said exactly what I wanted to hear, only to realize later it was a fake, only an impressionist.

It made me remember that nothing, and nobody, sounds like our God. His voice is unique. I just have to listen long enough, and know His voice well enough.

Psalm 119:72 says, “Instruction from Your lips is better for me than thousands of gold and silver pieces.” When I truly believe this, it shows, because I am at the feet of Jesus until I hear His voice. Nothing I have to do that day is more important when I believe His voice is better than any earthly treasure.

When I long for God and put my hope in His word, as Psalm 119:81 says, I will always listen long enough because that’s where my hope is.

Psalm 1:1-2 says, “How happy is the man who does not follow the advice of the wicked or take the path of sinners or join a group of mockers! Instead, his delight is in the LORD’s instruction, and he meditates on it day and night.”

When this is me, when I am meditating on God’s instructions (the Bible) I will become intimately acquainted with what His voice sounds like. I will know what it’s like for the very God of the universe to speak directly to my heart. I’ll realize no impressionist can ever sound like my God.

When I am like the psalmist in Psalm 63:8, which says, “I follow close to You; Your right hand holds on to me,” there is no way I am going to miss when my God whispers, or speaks loudly. I am going to know His voice. Why? Well, have you ever missed what someone was saying when you were hanging on to each other for dear life? Who we are close to is who we hear.

This was such a great reminder for me. It reminded me that nothing needs to take priority over hearing God every second of every day. If I hear too many fakes, I’ll quickly forget the true sound of my Lord, and if I am not hearing clearly, I am simply not listening long enough, so that I can know His voice well enough.

I don’t know about you, but I’m going to make sure I hear Him and not some “wanna be” impressionist. Let’s strive together to hear our God’s voice. Let’s listen long enough, and know His voice well enough to never be fooled again.

Seeking Hearts Ministries

• photo by ABC Radio Australia

Picking and Choosing

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am i apathetic to the lost, am i blessed, American Dream, apathy, becoming greedy, blessings, christian apathy, christian narcissism, greed, hoarding, pickiness, provision, religion, sharing blessings, sharing the Gospel, truth, why do we get blessings, winning souls

The other day I saw a Facebook post come across my feed that said, “Half the world is starving while the other half is trying to lose weight.”

It definitely made me think about the physical starvation of people, but it was like a punch in the gut when I thought about the spiritual side of things.

Most of us pick and choose our Christianity like we pick and choose items off of a buffet.

Millions have never even heard the name of Jesus, yet I decide which teacher I like best, which ministry I’ll support and which translation of the Bible I deem as appropriate to study from. I gorge myself and then look around in condescension on those who aren’t choosing the same things off the menu as I am.

Meanwhile, in the real world, others are starving to hear the Word. They are hungry and trying to fill their empty plates with anything that even seems like it might fit. What am I doing? I’m standing in the line at the buffet. Desperate people are simply trying to find the door to the restaurant while my back is turned refilling my plate over and over.

Can you tell I’m a little mad at myself? I’m actually sickened. I’m sickened by my excuses and lack of love.

Oswald J. Smith said, “No one has the right to hear the gospel twice, while there remains someone who has not heard it once.”

Hudson Taylor said, “Perhaps if there were more of that intense distress for souls that leads to tears, we should more frequently see the results we desire. Sometimes it may be that while we are complaining of the hardness of the hearts of those we are seeking to benefit, the hardness of our own hearts and our feeble apprehension of the solemn reality of eternal things may be the true cause of our want of success.”

I find myself getting into lulls with praying for the lost. Sometimes, it’s an intense burden to pray for individuals by name, literally begging God to break through a particular heart so they will receive Him. At other times though, it’s as if I’ve never met a lost person in my life. I’m clueless and heartless and a day becomes a week before I mention a lost soul in my prayers once again. Am I not doing Bible study during this lull? Am I not going to church? Am I not memorizing Scripture with my youngest? Am I not writing the blog? The crazy thing is that I AM! Don’t worry…I’m still at the buffet filling my own plate. Apparently, I’m just not willing to share.

I’m finding that Hudson Taylor must be right. It’s my own hardness of heart that stops the growth of Christianity in my generation. Where’s the distress over souls?!What is wrong with me?! Have I become narcissistic in my Christianity? Is there such a thing? How can I be a Christian and obsessed with myself? Isn’t that impossible? If I’m a “little Christ”, aren’t I obsessed with others and dying to self daily?“O wretched man that I am! Who shall deliver me from the body of this death?” (Romans 7:24)

The very next verse of Romans 7 says that only Jesus Christ can deliver me and oh, I know that’s true. He’s delivered me over and over again. He’s replaced this hard heart so many times I’ve lost count. I’m so thankful He never gives up on me. I am so thankful that He has convicted me once again and is reminding me of the millions who have yet to know Him. I thank Him that He does not want one soul to perish without Him (2 Peter 3:9). I thank Him that He is the Good Shepherd that continues to find the one little lost lamb (Matthew 18:11-14).

I’m thankful for this buffet that He has for me, but I need to remember that I have been given this buffet to lure others in. The tantalizing aromas of grace and love must be all over me so that others want to come and partake as well. I have been able to taste and see that the Lord is good (Psalm 34:8) so that I can point others to the choicest meat. I’m supposed to share with others who are starving and not simply sit around looking at another person in line at the buffet talking about how good everything is. Yes, I am supposed to feed myself, but only so I can have the strength to feed others. That’s what this buffet is really for…to sustain us all, not just one, or two.

I’m reminded of the time when Jesus fed the massive multitude of over 5,000 people with two fish and five loaves of bread (Matthew 14). He commanded His disciples to share and not hoard it. Can you imagine the rebuke they would have gotten had they just hoarded it away and kept it all for themselves? Such a thing is laughable to us becasue we know the hungry crowd was right in front of them, but isn’t the hungry crowd in front of us as well?

We have been given so much more than two fish and five loaves and He has commanded us to go and share, but we have become hoarders of God’s provision and I know in my own life… I’m sick of smelling the fish. When I am tight fisted with God’s buffet, no one benefits, including myself. Blessings are meant to be shared.

When did we get so scared of losing what God has given us to begin with? 

As I stare at my buffet of Bibles, talents, study guides and so much more, I have to ask my Lord what the next step is. Would you be willing to do the same? We all have our own buffet of provision. How does God want you to share yours?

“Half the world is starving while the other half is trying to lose weight.”

It’s a real shame that this statement has become so true when all along the food has been for us all. Thank God for His provision today, but let’s stop picking and choosing and get to sharing instead.

Seeking Hearts Ministries

My Story with Christ

** Picture from Noka’s Lavish Buffet Spread

 

 

Getting Mud Between My Toes

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a messy life, being hurt in church, christian journey, dealing with vain tradition, disappointments in church, encouragement, encouragement for the brokenhearted, getting dirty, getting messy in life, God's truth, how can I get past the hurt, I need encouragement, man's opinion, religion, tradition, tradition of men, truth, vain tradition, when life gets messy

 

Song of Solomon 5:3-5 says, “I have taken off my dress. How can I put it on again? I have washed my feet. How can I dirty them again? My Beloved extended His hand through the opening, and my feelings were aroused for Him. I arose to open to my Beloved…”

Lately, I’ve been pretty discouraged with what I will call the “established” church. Not the doctrine, but the implementation of that doctrine through tradition and opinion. I’ve really questioned my place in ministry on a local level and I’ve been anxious about God calling me to another area of service before I’m “ready”…whatever that means. (Imagine the kid on the team who doesn’t think he’s ready to play, white knuckling the bench every time the coach needs another player, cringing in case he hears his name called? Yep, that’s been me.)

As I was reading through Song of Solomon, I came across this beautiful passage in chapter 5 and realized that even though I feel as if I have washed my feet and taken off the old garments and do not want to get dirtied up again, when my Beloved reaches for me, I’ll be ready. Why? Because my feelings for Him will once again allow me to willingly say, “Yes” to whatever He has for me. I won’t be excited because of the assignment. I will be ecstatic because I get to run away with my Beloved. So what if I get a little dirt on my clothes and feel mud oozing through my toes? So what if life gets messy once again? As long as my Beloved is guiding me, as long as I am open to His guidance, it will always be worth it. I’m finally remembering that it’s always better to be a little dirty with Jesus than sitting in a room scared that I’ll ruin my shoes.

Life is messy. Ministry is messy. Family life is messy. You name it and it’s messy, but God has called us to minister, to love and to bless others, not to stay in the chamber of our life too scared of a little dirt to follow Him when He reaches for us.

Right now, God has me in a place of encouragement and excitement and I am able to enjoy simply being in His presence. It’s fun, but I know that there may come a time when He reaches for me to enter the fray once again. Whatever that may look like, however things may play out, whenever He reaches for me to come out of my pristine chamber I will run after Him knowing that He loves me more than I could ever imagine and knowing that when I get dirtied up again He is faithful to cleanse, restore and renew. How could I not run with a God like that?

So, if you’re like me and a little nervous about the next step, (maybe you feel like the kid on the bench not quite ready to be in the game), know that when your Beloved extends His hand towards you to come away with Him, it’s always the right time and even if you don’t know you’re ready, He does. Be confident in who He sees, take His hand and run with Him as you have never run before.

My Story

Seeking Hearts Ministries

(image by seat of my soul)

 

Assumptions

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assuming, assumptions, daily trust, God, God has our back, God's ways, manipulation, religion, trust, trusting God with our children

 What is my automatic reaction to trouble in my life? What is my automatic assumption when issues come up? Do I automatically think that something is trouble? Do I assume that the slightest whispering in our church family is going to be a massive fissure? Do I truly believe that God has my back, or do I ASSUME that I must figure things out for myself?

I began asking myself these questions as our Sunday School studied through II Samuel some time ago. In chapter 4 of II Samuel, we find the story of Mephibosheth. Mephibosheth was one of Jonathon’s sons. You remember that Jonathon was one of King Saul’s sons and heir to the throne of Israel according to man’s law. God anointed King David instead, but God gave Jonathon and David a deep friendship where no jealousy erupted. Jonathon agreed with God that David should be King. He willingly submitted to God’s choice.

II Samuel 4:4, states, “Now Jonathon, Saul’s son had a son crippled in both feet. He was five years old when the report of Saul and Jonathon came from Jezreel, and his nurse took him and fled. And it happened that in her hurry to flee, he fell and became lame. And his name was Mephibosheth.”

You might be asking the question, “What report? What happened to Saul and Jonathon?” This is where you find the transition in leadership of Israel. King Saul and Jonathon had both died on the battle field and a new king was coming into power. Mephibosheth’s nurse ASSUMED that Mephibosheth would be killed. She ASSUMED that the new king would be as other kings and kill any perceived threat to his throne. She ASSUMED that she would have to protect her charge. Her love for Mephibosheth caused a chain of events that could have been prevented had she stopped, prayed and listened to God’s take on the matter. If she had simply stopped, looked up and listened, God would have told her to be still and allow the new king to find them. In II Samuel 9, King David searched for a son of Jonathon to honor. He took Mephibosheth as his own honored son. She would have saved herself and Mephibosheth years of anxiety and physical impairment if she had just stopped, looked to God and listened for His voice.

Psalm 46:10 tells us to be still and know that He is God. Sometimes, the only way to know whether our trust is in ourselves, or our God is to be still in His presence. We can know then if we are trusting, or assuming. Our trust is going in the right direction if we are good with Him working without our “help”. If we are fretting and stewing and trying to figure things out on our own, well, we confess that as sin and ask Him to help us truly rest in Him. He has our back no matter what circumstances look like around us. Job 23:10 says,“But He knows the way that I take; When He has tried me, I shall come forth as gold.”

How many times have I ASSUMED things as Mephibosheth’s nurse did? How many times have I ASSUMED that my choice was God’s choice? How many times have I let a false urgency dictate my reaction and ASSUME a way was God’s way because I saw no other option? How many times have I crippled those around me because I ASSUMED?

I am so convicted by these questions. So many times I hear God’s leading and submit to the role that He has called me to, but in the day-to-day grind, I think it’s up to me to figure things out. I am so wrong. I must be still and hear Him daily, if not hourly, if not every single minute.  Isaiah 55:8-9, tells us, “For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Neither are your ways My ways,” declares the LORD. “For as the heavens are higher than the earth, So are My ways higher than your ways, And My thoughts than your thoughts.” How is He to reveal His thoughts to me if I am not still enough to listen? How does He instill the mind of Christ in me, as II Corinthians 10:5 says, if I am in a constant state of assumption?

Have you ever noticed a night sky filled with stars? Have you noticed the peace and encouragement of each twinkle? What about those nights you haven’t noticed? Why are some nights different from others? I know in my own life when I have actually looked up, I notice.  When I stop and am still in the moment, I see. When someone is pulling me in all directions to hurry up, or I’m thinking of what’s next instead of being in the moment, I don’t see the same stars that are there every, single night. So it is with God. His ways are always there for me to see. His thoughts are always open for me to hear, (Isaiah 30:20b-21), but, am I in the moment with Him? Or, am I rushing around ASSUMING He agrees with me?

My heart breaks every time I hear the name Mephibosheth. I am reminded that an assuming nurse caused a lot of heartache. Yes, everything is beautiful for him in the end, but God’s original plan for his life was so much better. God did not just want him sitting at King David’s table, but frolicking in the courtyard as well. As a mom, this really makes me stop and think. I need to allow God to work His perfect plan in my children’s lives as well as my own. I do not need to ASSUME anything where they are concerned. God has their back just like He has mine. I do not need to manipulate circumstances so that they are doing my will for their lives, but God’s alone. Mephibosheth reminds me that God not only wants my children sitting at His banquet daily, but frolicking in the courtyard as well. I need to loosen my grip, stop running around in a panic assuming the worst and simply place them in the arms of the King.

Let’s stop assuming and simply trust.

Seeking Hearts Ministries

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