Staying Broken

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In Watchman Nee’s book “The Breaking of the Outer Man and the Release of the Spirit”, he expresses that in order for Christ to flow freely out of us and into the world around us, we must be broken vessels. He gives example after example of life being released only once a vessel has been broken.

One example Nee uses is a seed. In John 12:24, Jesus says, “Unless the grain of wheat falls in to the ground and dies, it abides alone; but if it dies, it bears much fruit.” He explains that it’s not a matter of whether the grain has life, but whether the outer shell is broken. How does this happen? Through temperature, rain, and the earth itself. All come together to break the shell of the seed, so the life of the grain can be exposed and grow.

Another example Nee uses is the alabaster flask in John 12. Unless the flask had been broken, the pure oil would not have been released. Without the breaking, the precious ointment would have still been inside. The value wouldn’t have been released without the breaking of the outer shell.

As I was contemplating this first chapter, trying to absorb new truths, I remembered that Nee asked, “What if the broken places in our lives, the very wounds that we try to keep covered, what if those are the very places Christ can shine through?”

Wait a minute. You mean all those injuries, all those hurts, all those cracks in this hard shell are supposed to stay open? You mean I don’t have to “pick myself up and dust myself off”? You mean as I lay broken in complete surrender at the foot of the Cross, that’s when people see God in me? It’s not about “having it all together”, but really about falling apart?

Wow. Just wow.

I’ve always thought that putting my broken pieces back together made me a “good Christian”, a stronger Christian, when in reality that was defeating the purpose. When I cement the pieces that God has broken away from me back with self-recrimination, doubts, discouragement, self-judgment, or whatever adhesive I’m using that day, all I’m doing is removing the places that the light of God can shine through. Then, He has to get His chisel out once again.

When I realize all the wounds, the hurts, the disappointments that have become broken places in my life are for God to shine through, then it’s all worth it. Why would I try to put pieces back together that have always been meant to be exposed? How can I be the light of the world if I’m not willing to let Him shine through my broken places?

I’ll admit, this is completely foreign territory for me. I’m really into “having it all together”. Believe me. But, I’m more into what God wants me to be, and this feels right. This concept of staying broken before Him makes sense. It’s about absolute surrender. It’s about being the branch and depending on our Vine. It’s about being the light in a dark world. If I have a hard shell, that doesn’t happen. If my alabaster flask stays closed, His life-giving ointment cannot flow onto others. I’m not talking about staying a victim. That’s unhealthy. What I am talking about is allowing God’s hand to remove the dry, crusty shell of a girl who has places in her life that are hard as a rock. Nee says that we can’t speed up the process, but we can extend it. I have definitely seen this in my own life.

So, my prayer has changed quite a bit over the last few weeks. Instead of praying for ways to “get it together”, I’m praying for the places that need to be broken to be removed in His time and in His way. I’m praying for the continued willingness to let the pieces fall where He wants them to fall, and allow them to stay that way in order for His presence to shine through me.

Let’s be broken together so that all people see is His light shining through.

Seeking Hearts Ministries

*image by prayers4america

 

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Can You See Me?

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all things are possible, are all things possible, Christianity, don't be discourgaed, encouragement, faith, God's good gifts, good works, Harry Potter, Harry Potter cloak, Harry Potter invisiblity cloak, how can I do good, how can I do good works, how can I keep the Ten Commandments, I can do all things through Christ, invisibility cloak, is good works really possible, is the invisibility cloak real, Robe of righteousness

Scripture has so many mandates for us to live by. For example, “Be ye holy, for I am holy,” I Peter 1:16; “…overcome evil with good,” Romans 12:21; “Be devoted to one another in brotherly love,” Romans 12:10a. We have MANY more, not the least of which is the Ten Commandments and the Beatitudes. An example in the Beatitudes is found in Luke 6:27, “…do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.” Scripture is full of expectations for the Christian life. We are not to touch certain things, look at certain things, or even dwell upon certain things. AAAGH!! Is anyone else feeling overwhelmed? I mean seriously, “do good to those who hate you”?

We also have MANY Scriptures that assure us that the Lord’s yoke is easy and His burden is light (Matthew11:30). That everything He calls us to do, He is faithful to complete in us (I Thessalonians 5:24). So, what’s the deal? Are we required to fulfill all the regulations and rules that overwhelm us, or is His burden light? The two seem to be polar opposites. After all, being devoted to one another and not our own desires is not easy. Overcoming evil with good is a full time job as well. What is easy and light about those things?

When I was feeling overwhelmed about all the seemingly impossible expectations that God had place on me several years back, God led me to remember some Scripture that I would have rather not remembered. Isaiah 64:6 says that my righteousness is as filthy rags. Romans 7 reminded me that I constantly have this war within me between God’s Spirit and my flesh and must come to the conclusion that, “…nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh;”.

So, if God is faithful to accomplish what He asks, how does all of this rectify? How am I to be holy when nothing good dwells in me? How is He completing His good work in me when I am so full of struggle?

Isaiah 61:10, says, “I will rejoice greatly in the LORD, My soul will exult in my God; For He has clothed me with a robe of righteousness, As a bridegroom decks himself with a garland, And as a bride adorns herself with jewels.”

This verse tells me that God clothes me with His robe of righteousness. Only His righteousness is clean, mine is filthy. Only His righteousness is holy, not mine. My works are nothing, His are pure and perfect.

Think of Harry Potter’s invisibility cloak. Yes, Harry Potter. If you have seen any of the movies, you will recall that when Harry placed the cloak around himself, no one could see him. He roamed around the school and no one knew that it was him. They didn’t see Harry as long as he was wearing the cloak. Harry chose to wear the cloak, or robe if you will, and it changed how others viewed him.  

So it is with the robe of righteousness that is given to us. It is our choice whether we wear it, or not. Just as the verse in Isaiah describes a bride adorning her own self with jewels, it is the bride’s choice whether she places them around her neck, or hair, or leaves them off entirely. She made the choice to wear the jewels and we make the choice whether to wear the robe of righteousness that is freely given.

Isaiah 45:24 says, “…Only in the LORD are righteousness and strength.” Jeremiah assures us in chapter 33 that the LORD is our righteousness. II Corinthians 5 reminds us that just as Harry disappeared under that cloak of invisibility and he was completely changed, so our old man dies and our new creature in Christ now reigns in us. Verse 18 of this chapter says, “Now all these things are from God, who reconciled Himself to us through Christ, and gave us the ministry of reconciliation.” Even our “new man” and the things that our “new man” accomplishes are given to us by God. Nothing in us is good. It is ALL Him.

Now, when I see a Scripture that seems to have a commandment that is overwhelming, I use it as a checkpoint. I ask myself, “Do I remember that nothing good is in me except the Holy Spirit?”

“Have I been taking credit for anything that only God can do through me?”

“Have I submitted myself and bowed before Him in order that He can place His robe of righteousness over me today?”

“Am I feeling overwhelmed, or do I know that God has got this?”

When I am out from under His robe, I think it is all about me. When I am under His cloak, His influence, I remember that it is all about Him. When I am covered in His righteousness, His burden is light because it is all up to Him. Whatever He wants accomplished through me that day, it happens. Other things being on hold are okay because I am under HIS cloak, HIS righteousness. When I poke my foot out, there are problems, but when I am totally under His robe, I am exactly where He wants me to be.

A beautiful picture of this is found in Revelation 19:7-8, “ ‘Let us rejoice and be glad and give the glory to Him, for the marriage of the Lamb has come and His bride has made herself ready.’ And it was given to her to clothe herself in fine linen, bright and clean; for the fine linen is the righteous acts of the saints (holy ones).”

Here, we see another bride (us) making ready for her (our) wedding day. She chooses to clothe herself in garments that were GIVEN to her. She didn’t have to work for them. She just had to accept them. The garments are fine linen, but the Scripture goes on to tell us that the fine linen is the righteous acts of the holy ones. Yet again, we see that acts that we think we have accomplished on our own were given to us. We see yet again that there is nothing good in us. It is ALL God. If we have ever accomplished the smallest task for His kingdom, He gave us the idea, the strength to do it, the time and desire to accomplish it. Everything good, pure and clean is from our God. He will give us fine linen, bright and clean just as He has given us His robe of righteousness for today.

Let’s allow Him to cover us fully so that others will only see Him. Let’s choose to disappear into His cloak of righteousness. Let’s willingly submit to what He wants to accomplish through us and see the pleasure on His face when he says to us, “Well done. That’s just what I envisioned you wearing today.”

*image by CNN.com

Seeking Hearts Ministries

Pickin’ and Choosin’

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Several months ago I saw a Facebook post come across my feed that said, “Half the world is starving while the other half is trying to lose weight.”

It definitely made me think about the physical starvation of people, but it was like a punch in the gut when I thought about the spiritual side of things.

Most of us pick and choose our Christianity like we pick and choose items off of a buffet.

Millions have never even heard the name of Jesus, yet I decide which teacher I like best, which ministry I’ll support and which translation of the Bible I deem as appropriate to study from. I gorge myself and then look around in condescension on those who aren’t choosing the same things off the menu as I am.

Meanwhile, in the real world, others are starving to hear the Word. They are hungry and trying to fill their empty plates with anything that even seems like it might fit.

What am I doing? I’m standing in the line at the buffet.

Desperate people are simply trying to find the door to the restaurant while my back is turned refilling my plate over and over.

Can you tell I’m a little mad at myself? I’m actually sickened. I’m sickened by my excuses and lack of love.

Oswald J. Smith said, “No one has the right to hear the Gospel twice, while there remains someone who has not heard it once.”

Hudson Taylor said, “Perhaps if there were more of that intense distress for souls that leads to tears, we should more frequently see the results we desire. Sometimes it may be that while we are complaining of the hardness of the hearts of those we are seeking to benefit, the hardness of our own hearts and our feeble apprehension of the solemn reality of eternal things may be the true cause of our want of success.”

I find myself getting into lulls with praying for the lost. Sometimes, it’s an intense burden to pray for individuals by name, literally begging God to break through a particular heart so they will receive Him. At other times though, it’s as if I’ve never met a lost person in my life. I’m clueless, and heartless, and a day becomes a week before I mention a lost soul in my prayers once again. Am I not doing Bible study during this lull? Am I not going to church? Am I not memorizing Scripture with my youngest? Am I not writing the blog? The crazy thing is that I AM! Don’t worry… I’m still at the buffet filling my own plate. Apparently, I’m just not willing to share.

I’m finding that Hudson Taylor must be right. It’s my own hardness of heart that stops the growth of Christianity in my generation. Where’s the distress over souls?!What is wrong with me?! Have I become narcissistic in my Christianity? Is there such a thing? How can I be a Christian and obsessed with myself? Isn’t that impossible? If I’m a “little Christ”, aren’t I obsessed with others and dying to self daily?“O wretched man that I am! Who shall deliver me from the body of this death?” (Romans 7:24)

The very next verse of Romans 7 says that only Jesus Christ can deliver me and oh, I know that’s true. He’s delivered me over and over again. He’s replaced this hard heart so many times I’ve lost count. I’m so thankful He never gives up on me. I am so thankful that He has convicted me once again and is reminding me of the millions who have yet to know Him. I thank Him that He does not want one soul to perish without Him (2 Peter 3:9). I thank Him that He is the Good Shepherd that continues to find the one little lost lamb (Matthew 18:11-14).

I am thankful for this buffet that He has for me, but I need to remember that I have been given this buffet to lure others in. The tantalizing aromas of grace and love must be all over me so that others want to come and partake as well. I have been able to taste and see that the Lord is good (Psalm 34:8) so that I can point others to the choicest meat. I’m supposed to share with others who are starving and not simply sit around looking at another person in line at the buffet talking about how good everything is. Yes, I am supposed to feed myself, but only so I can have the strength to feed others. That’s what this buffet is really for…to sustain us all, not just one, or two.

I’m reminded of the time when Jesus fed the massive multitude of over 5,000 people with two fish and five loaves of bread (Matthew 14). He commanded His disciples to share and not hoard it. Can you imagine the rebuke they would have gotten had they just hoarded it away and kept it all for themselves? Such a thing is laughable to us because we know the hungry crowd was right in front of them, but isn’t the hungry crowd in front of us as well?

We have been given so much more than two fish and five loaves. He has commanded us to go and share, but we have become hoarders of God’s provision. I know in my own life… I’m sick of smelling the fish. When I am tight-fisted with God’s buffet, no one benefits, including myself. Blessings are meant to be shared.

When did we get so scared of losing what God has given us to begin with? 

As I stare at my buffet of Bibles, talents, study guides and so much more, I have to ask my Lord what the next step is. Would you be willing to do the same? We all have our own buffet of provision. How does God want you to share yours?

“Half the world is starving while the other half is trying to lose weight.”

It’s a real shame that this statement has become so true when all along the food has been for us all. Thank God for His provision today, but let’s stop pickin’ and choosin’ and get to sharin’ instead.

Seeking Hearts Ministries

My Story with Christ

** Picture from Noka’s Lavish Buffet Spread

 

 

When I take Things into my own Hands

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a different perspective, am I seeking God as I should, Are my talents my own, Do I have false gods in my life, Do I take things for granted, does God provide, Does God provide while I'm in sin, faith, God's character, God's faithfulness, good start to your day, Is God faithful, Is ministry in my hands or God's, Taking things for granted, the golden calf

    Exodus 32:1-5 says, “Now when the people saw that Moses delayed to come down from the mountain, the people assembled about Aaron, and said to him, ‘Come, make us a god who will go before us; as for this Moses, the man who brought us up from the land of Egypt, we do not know what has become of him.’ And Aaron said to them, ‘Tear off the gold rings which are in the ears of your wives, your sons, your daughters, and bring them to me.’ Then all the people tore off the gold rings which were in their ears, and brought them to Aaron. And he took this from their hand, and fashioned it with a graving tool, and made it into a molten calf; and they said, ‘This is your god, O Israel, who brought you up from the land of Egypt.’ Now when Aaron saw this, he built an altar before it; and Aaron made a proclamation and said, ‘Tomorrow shall be a feast to the LORD.’”

Familiarity with this passage can sometimes lead us to pass over nuggets that the Lord has left for us. Over the last few hours, I have literally seen five or six new things in this Scripture that I have never noticed before. I love that about the Word of God. God’s Word never changes, but it is alive and active. It is like a diamond in that when the Holy Spirit shines His light upon it, a new facet is discovered. How can we tire of something so amazing?

In Bertha Smith’s book “How the Spirit Filled My Life”, she says this regarding the passage above, “Not only had the calf been made, but sacrifices had been offered to it. The Israelites, who were daily eating the bread from heaven, gave God’s glory to that calf.”

I confess I had never thought about the fact that the Israelites were STILL receiving manna during this extreme act of idolatry. Was this true? Was God still providing sustenance to the Israelites while sin was running rampant through the camp?

In Exodus 16, we read where God began to provide manna for His people. He states clearly that manna would fall from heaven each morning as dew. The people would gather enough for the day every morning, except on the sixth day. On this day, they would gather twice as much in order to observe the Sabbath. At times, God provided meat, but overall, manna was the constant provision of the LORD God.

In Joshua 5:12, we see where God stops the manna. Was He tired of providing? No, the Israelites had started eating the fruit of The Promised Land so manna was no longer necessary. He was still providing, but in a totally different way. Their time in the desert was over.

Obviously, Exodus 32 is between these Scriptures. So, manna is still on the ground. The people of God are still being provided for during Moses’ absence. I have always thought that there must not have been a word from the Lord during this time, but there clearly was. Every time the manna fell each morning, God was assuring His people that He was faithful. He was assuring them that He was still in control and had their needs met before they woke up each day.  He was assuring them that even without Moses, they still had a relationship with Him. They were His people.

As they came up with their plan to create a new god we have to wonder, “Where did they think the manna had come from that very morning?”

Exodus 32, verse 6 tells us that the people sat down to eat and drink in celebration of their new found god. What did they eat and drink? They were literally drinking and eating what their true God had provided. Mind boggling, isn’t it? They were plainly holding in their hands the provision of God Himself yet, they were worshipping an idol. Not any idol, but an idol they had created themselves. They literally saw it formed before their very eyes, but they still served it.

It’s astounding, truly, until I stop and think about my own life. I confess that I have often done the same. I have prayed for ministry opportunities and when given those opportunities I have, like Aaron, taken God’s provision into my hands and “fashioned it with a graven tool into a molten calf” (verse 4). I have crafted things into my image instead of the image of Christ. I have wanted things to look a certain way, be a certain way, and feel a certain way (and by certain, I mean my way). I have molded and crafted and shaped things into gods in one hand while eating from His provision in the other.

I have created other gods as well. False gods like fear, when all around me the one true God has provided perfect safety.

I have also created the false god of self. Even while acknowledging any talent or skill has been provided by my Father, I obsess over things so much, I realize it’s no longer about worship, but about me.

I have created the god of pride, while quoting Scriptures about how there is nothing good in me.

The list goes on and on… fashioning a golden calf in one hand while gathering manna in the other.

God is ever faithful. He is ever Provider. Even when I choose to use that provision as a god, He is still Sustainer. He still provides sustenance when I am clearly following my own god. He is still the ever present Helper when I get in trouble. He is still the Great I Am. He is still the King of kings and Lord of lords. He is still God alone. Our God is truly amazing. He is faithful to provide even when we use that provision in a way it was never meant to be used.

As we go about our day, may we be ever mindful of what we are worshiping. As we start to fashion anything that is not of God, may we remember to stop, surrender it all back to Him, and leave our ministries, our families, our talents, our everything in HIS hands alone.

 *Photo by Allen Wallace

Seeking Hearts Ministries

When Things Aren’t as they Seem

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all things through Christ, am I just pretending, being a real christian, being real, christians who pretend, How can I know who is a real Christian, Is being Christlike possible, people who prentend, pretending to be something we are not, the differences in fakes, what am I supposed to say, Who am I

Last week, our oldest celebrated his 22nd birthday. He decided that instead of cake, he wanted fruit. He’s always wanted strawberries, but this was new. The morning of the big day I set the fruit on a large, white platter, but it just wasn’t nearly celebratory enough. So, I went back downstairs to gather my crystal. I set fruit in several crystal bowls, stuck a candle in a massive strawberry, and this momma was finally satisfied that the display was birthday worthy.

After the festivities, my husband and I were washing up all the pretty little dishes. We hit one of them with a fork, and ‘DING’, that perfect sound rang all over the kitchen. Mark said, “That’s a good piece of crystal.” I looked at it and said, “Really? I thought this one was.” We took the other piece and hit it (gently) and it kind of sounded like a ‘Dung’ more than a pretty little ‘Ding’.

It was so interesting. The good quality crystal didn’t look as fancy as the poor quality. It was just sitting there, unassuming, knowing what it had going for it. It didn’t have as fancy as a pattern. It didn’t have the decorative features of the other piece. It just sat there, knowing that what it was made of was right for the occasion.

The not so quality piece of crystal was ornate, decorative, and very showy. It screamed, “I’m here.” When it made a sound though, the truth came out. I realized that all the ornamentation was to distract me from knowing the truth.

These pieces of crystal reminded me that I need to make sure the sounds that I make are in keeping with who I am in Christ. They also reminded me that even when I’m impressed with how someone looks, or sings, or even preaches, the sound they make when they get “hit” proves what’s on the inside. Is it praise, or complaint? Is it a temper, or grace? Is it Christ, or self?

So, what sound should come out?

A good verse to go to is Ephesians 4:29. It  says, “Let no filthy talk come out of your mouths, but only what is good for building up as the need may be. This way you will give grace to those who hear you.”

I confess, I often get caught up in the first part of this verse. I say to myself, “Well, I didn’t actually cuss, so I’m good.” I lose the next part, the part where I am ONLY to say things that build people up.

Sound impossible? If I am just using my best effort to look like a great quality Christian instead of actually being one, it is. Just like the crystal at Wes’ birthday. The sound I make tells on me every time. Just because I’m not cursing doesn’t mean I’m building people up. In fact, if all I’m doing is biting my tongue, the sound I am supposed to make (building people up) never happens.

Watchman Nee, in his book Sit, Walk, Stand – The Process of Christian Maturity, says this: “Too many are caught acting as Christians. The life of too many Christians today is largely a pretense. They live a “spiritual” life, talk a “spiritual” language, adopt “spiritual” attitudes, but they are doing the whole thing themselves. It is the effort involved that should reveal to them that something is wrong. They force themselves from doing this, from saying that – and how hard they find it all! It is just the same as when we Chinese try to talk a language that is not our own. No matter how hard we try, it does not come spontaneously; we have to force ourselves to talk that way. But when it comes to speaking our own language, nothing could be easier. Even when we forget all about what we are doing, we still speak it. It flows. It comes to us perfectly naturally, and its very spontaneity reveals to everyone what we are.”

When I depend on Christ, through the Holy Spirit He has already placed inside of me, the sound I make is Him, not me. Instead of a pretender, He makes me the real thing. Instead of just apperaing to be Christ-like, He makes me like Him through and through. Still sound impossible? It would be without assurances like these:

Ephesians 3:20 – “Now to the one who can do infinitely more than all we can ask or imagine according to the power that is working among us.”

Philippians 2:13 – “For it is God who is working in you, ⌊enabling you⌋ both to desire and to work out His good purpose.” He gives us the “want to” and the power to actually accomplish it.

Let’s stop pretending and let Him do His perfect work in us. Let’s rest in the fact that when we are resting in Him, He cleans us up, cleans us out, and replaces us with Him. Then, when a hit comes our way, the sound we make is something that would bring Him glory, and will come as naturally as speaking our native langauge. Only God can do that in me, and in you. Let’s let Him do it.

Seeking Hearts Ministries

 

 

 

*Photo by iStock

Is My Gym Easier to Find Than My Church?

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am i being the light in my community, am I reaching out to my community, am I witnessing as God intends, being the light, can people find my church, people need Jesus, reaching out to community, witnessing as God intended

A few months ago, my husband and I were trying to find a church in our new area. We went to the directory on the city’s website, we scoured the internet, and we wracked our brains trying to think of churches to visit. Do you know what? It was harder than we realized. My husband and I both had family churches growing up, so we never had to search for a church when we were younger. We had even moved to two different states, and found churches fairly easily, but back in our home state, back in our hometown, it was hard.

Several weeks later, I was in my local gym and the guy working there was telling me about a promotion they had going where if I recommended someone, I would get a free t-shirt. He went on to say, “I think it’s kind of dumb. Everyone in this town knows where the gym is.” I realized he was right, and I realized that it is much easier to find the gym than a church.

It made me wonder if because we live in the “Bible Belt” maybe we as churches assume that everyone knows where to find us. We must think that if grandma knew about us, grandchild must know about us too. I don’t know what we’re thinking, but I do know that Mark and I remembered the names of several churches that were not in any directory, anywhere. We had to wonder if they were full.

While it was very frustrating to go through the process of trying to find a new church, I’m glad it happened. Knowing the difficulty it was for my family to discover the place where we “fit” when we were searching, it made me realize that those who aren’t searching will never find us if we don’t do a better job of reaching out. If I can find a gym faster than I can find Jesus in a community, there is something wrong.

So, as I move forward in my faith, I’m praying God shows me how to reach out more, how to compel without being annoying, how to be the light in this community that He’s called me to be, and above all for my church to be easier to find than my gym!

*image by ForestWander Nature Photography

Seeking Hearts Ministries

 

It’s All in a Voice

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am I hearing God, can I really hear God, Christianity, distinguishing god's voice, encouragement, hearing God, how to hear God, how to hear God's voice, how to know God's voice, is this God, listen to His voice, religion, truth

I was listening to a local radio station yesterday and actually recognized a voice that I hadn’t heard in quite some time. Even though said person was not a usual radio personality, I knew instantly who it was.

My youngest and I were talking about this later…how you can instantly recognize voices. Every voice is unique, like a fingerprint. He went on to say that even really good impressionists don’t sound exactly like the original.

As I was thinking about all of this, I realized that some impressionists have fooled me… for a time. The more I listened though, the more I realized something was “off”, and I knew they were a fake. As Gabe and I were talking I said, “If you listen long enough, and you know the voice well enough, you can always tell.”

Hmmm.

If you listen long enough, and know the voice well enough, you can always tell.

That’s the key in knowing God’s voice, isn’t it? Listening long enough, and knowing His voice well enough.

It made me remember all the times where I have been so impatient. I wanted to hear God’s voice, but I wanted to hear it quickly. After all, I had a lot to do that day.

It made me remember all the times where I thought I heard His voice because it sounded just like I thought it would, and it said exactly what I wanted to hear, only to realize later it was a fake, only an impressionist.

It made me remember that nothing, and nobody, sounds like our God. His voice is unique. I just have to listen long enough, and know His voice well enough.

Psalm 119:72 says, “Instruction from Your lips is better for me than thousands of gold and silver pieces.” When I truly believe this, it shows, because I am at the feet of Jesus until I hear His voice. Nothing I have to do that day is more important when I believe His voice is better than any earthly treasure.

When I long for God and put my hope in His word, as Psalm 119:81 says, I will always listen long enough because that’s where my hope is.

Psalm 1:1-2 says, “How happy is the man who does not follow the advice of the wicked or take the path of sinners or join a group of mockers! Instead, his delight is in the LORD’s instruction, and he meditates on it day and night.”

When this is me, when I am meditating on God’s instructions (the Bible) I will become intimately acquainted with what His voice sounds like. I will know what it’s like for the very God of the universe to speak directly to my heart. I’ll realize no impressionist can ever sound like my God.

When I am like the psalmist in Psalm 63:8, which says, “I follow close to You; Your right hand holds on to me,” there is no way I am going to miss when my God whispers, or speaks loudly. I am going to know His voice. Why? Well, have you ever missed what someone was saying when you were hanging on to each other for dear life? Who we are close to is who we hear.

This was such a great reminder for me. It reminded me that nothing needs to take priority over hearing God every second of every day. If I hear too many fakes, I’ll quickly forget the true sound of my Lord, and if I am not hearing clearly, I am simply not listening long enough, so that I can know His voice well enough.

I don’t know about you, but I’m going to make sure I hear Him and not some “wanna be” impressionist. Let’s strive together to hear our God’s voice. Let’s listen long enough, and know His voice well enough to never be fooled again.

Seeking Hearts Ministries

• photo by ABC Radio Australia

Can God be Trusted?

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a great way to live, am i really trusting god, can God be trusted, Can I trust God, daily trust, dependence on God, does god ever fail, does God fail people, encouragement, encouragement to keep hanging on, is depending on God worth it, is God worth trusting, living in trust, trust, what does trusting God look like, will God fail me

This week’s blog is a video I made over a year ago, but God kept bringing it to mind once again. What a beautiful reminder to keep us going this year…our God can be trusted.

Can God be Trusted?

Forgiveness During the Holidays

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am i really supposed to forgive them, being with people who make us crazy, being with people who need to be forgiven, do i really have to forgive, forgiveness for all, forgiving as we are called to forgive, forgiving when it hurts, God's call to forgive, how can i forgive, how to deal with tough stuff, tough stuff to deal with

As we are all in the middle of this Holiday Season, some of us are having the time of our lives being with family we don’t see as often, neighbors we seldom find at home and friends whom we love dearly, but schedules often don’t match.

Others of us are quite stressed dealing with family, friends and neighbors. We can avoid them during the year, but not at Christmas. Old wounds pop up and the stress mounts. So, as weird as the timing may seem, I feel led to share how God has helped me to deal with unforgiveness in my life.

I want to be very honest and tell you that forgiveness is something that does not come easily for me and I am lots better at forgiving things that have happened to me personally than things that have happened to my husband, or especially to my boys.

Oftentimes, what I struggle with is not the act of forgiving as much as what does forgiveness look like moving forward. I believe that forgiveness does not look the same in every situation. The process usually is, but not necessarily what it looks like afterwards.

For example, if you have been abused as a child, or as an adult, and through the power of the Holy Spirit you are able to release that situation into the hands of our Righteous Judge, know that forgiveness in that situation does not mean that you will stay with a person who abuses you.

If you are being hurt, forgiveness does not mean that you stay and keep getting hurt. If you are being wounded, forgiveness does not mean you stay in a situation that continues to bring you harm.

Forgiveness is being completely free of bitterness, anger and the hurt that was caused. Forgiveness is not about being unwise. It’s about being free.

Forgiveness is not trusting someone who you know will hurt your children just like they hurt you. That is not what God expects when He is calling us to forgive.

Another example of being called to forgive could be if someone lied about you and everyone in your neighborhood believes it. Sometimes, forgiveness requires living your life, doing what God has called you to do each and every day and allowing your character to speak for you. Not cussing people out, not being cruel when that person comes around, but simply being who God is calling you to be. God is calling us to be people of grace, love and mercy shining the light of Jesus. People will notice how you respond to a person who wrongs you. It may take a while, but God makes sure the truth comes out. Here are some great examples of what forgiveness may look like in this kind of situation:

Proverbs 25:21-22 says, “If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat, and if he is thirsty, give him water to drink; for you will heap burning coals on his head, and the LORD will reward you.”

Proverbs 15:1 says, “A gentle answer turns away anger, but a harsh word stirs up wrath.”

So, you see? Forgiveness in one situation may look like getting away, but not allowing the hurt to come with you. Whereas in another situation, forgiveness may look like a person holding their tongue from what they really want to say while allowing God to show others who you are in Him.

Both situations can only be accomplished through the Lord and may seem impossible, but Jesus says in Matthew 19:26, “With men this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.” Jesus readily admitted that certain things were only possible with God and I believe forgiveness is one of them.

There are many other ways God may ask you to show forgiveness. These are just a couple of examples to help us understand that forgiveness may look different for every person reading this depending on what they are called to forgive.

So, how do we come to a place of forgiveness?

Can it be instantaneous?

Can it take a few months, or even a few years?

Simply put…yes. I have had all of the above.

The answer is that it will take as long as you and God need it to take.

Let me just say as well, that even when you have truly forgiven someone, things can still pop back up. A random thought, a word, a look, or even a Facebook message can trigger an issue you thought you had forgiven long ago. Don’t stuff it down. Know that God wants you to deal with it once again with Him. He never tires of helping us get through our struggles.

I think when Jesus told Peter to forgive 70×7, He knew that oftentimes the forgiveness needs to happen every time we remember the offense. Sometimes, people really do wrong us over and over and over when we can’t get out of a situation, but most of the time it’s our remembrance of the event that causes the need for multiple times of forgiveness. Our minds just keep replaying it and replaying it and replaying it and we are called to forgive every single time. Again, we can only do that through the power of the Holy Spirit.

Just so we are on the same wavelength let me tell you how the dictionary defines forgiveness: “To absolve from payment of (a debt, for example); to renounce anger or resentment against”.

Absolve means you do away with it; you cancel it. Do they owe you something? Absolutely, there is a debt involved, but you are choosing to cancel that debt so you are no longer tied to that situation in any way. As long as someone owes you something, you are still connected and tied to one another, but when you release that debt…no more strings…you are absolutely free.

The other part of that definition says, “…to renounce anger, or resentment — to give up, esp. by formal announcement; to reject.”

So, you are rejecting anger and resentment…that’s forgiveness.

Again the question: How do we get to a place of forgiveness? How do we get to the place of rejecting the anger and resentment?

1 – We have got to know that God loves us.

You see how it always comes back to that? That’s your foundation. (If you haven’t been able to see the YouTube session on God’s love, I highly recommend you do so. Knowing how much He loves us is the foundation of our trust in Him and knowing He can be trusted is how we are able to forgive. Here’s the link : God’s Love – Session 1)

Forgiveness is another layer of trusting God and we can’t trust God fully until we know how much He loves us.

Why is that so important?

God is sovereign. Whatever comes into our lives, passes through His hands(remember in John 10:27-29 Jesus says He will never let go of us so, everything must pass through His hands). Whether we view it as good, or bad, whatever He allows is to bring us closer to Him and closer to the people that He has created us to be.

How can you possibly trust the hands of someone you don’t believe loves you? How can you possibly believe that everything (good, or bad) that has passed through those hands is for your ultimate good, if you don’t know He loves you?

The first step to forgiving anyone is knowing God loves you enough to take care of you in any situation.

 2- Second step to forgiveness is focusing on God and not the situation.

You know He loves you and now you are going to stay focused on Him.

You are not looking around at what everyone has done to you. You are focused on Him.

I alluded to this passage a minute ago, but we are going to read it in its entirety now.

Matthew 18:21-33 says, “Then Peter came to Him and said, ‘Lord, how many times could my brother sin against me and I forgive him? As many as seven times?’ ‘I tell you, not as many as seven,’ Jesus said to him, ‘but 70 times seven. For this reason, the kingdom of heaven can be compared to a king who wanted to settle accounts with his slaves. When he began to settle accounts, one who owed 10,000 talents was brought before him. Since he had no way to pay it back, his master commanded that he, his wife, his children, and everything he had be sold to pay the debt. At this, the slave fell facedown before him and said, ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay you everything!’ Then the master of that slave had compassion, released him, and forgave him the loan. But that slave went out and found one of his fellow slaves who owed him 100 denarii. He grabbed him, started choking him, and said, ‘Pay what you owe!’ At this, his fellow slave fell down and began begging him, ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay you back.’ But he wasn’t willing. On the contrary, he went and threw him into prison until he could pay what was owed. When the other slaves saw what had taken place, they were deeply distressed and went and reported to their master everything that had happened. Then, after he had summoned him, his master said to him, ‘You wicked slave! I forgave you all that debt because you begged me. Shouldn’t you also have had mercy on your fellow slave, as I had mercy on you?’”

This is an amazing illustration of Jesus reminding us to not focus on what people have done to us, but rather focus on how much we have been forgiven ourselves.

That’s so hard. I know it’s hard, but it’s a great way to be able to forgive people. We must remember that we had such a huge sin debt and our beautiful, merciful, Prince Charming of a God has forgiven every bit of it.

We will be too busy being thankful to worry about what someone has done to us because our focus is on Him.

Isaiah 26:3 says, “You will keep the mind ⌊that is⌋ dependent ⌊on You⌋ in perfect peace, for it is trusting in You.”

So, we can remain secure in our forgiveness of others by our minds being dependent on our God and remembering who He is and being focused on His love for us.

 Forgiveness is about what God did for us and not what someone did to us.

It’s not about comparing whose sin is bigger, it’s remembering to be thankful for how much God has forgiven us.

That’s where I’m going to cut off today’s blog, but know there are 3 more points on how to forgive coming in the next blog. When you are trying to forgive, I pray that you will be honest with God about the difficulty you are having and trust Him to give you the power to forgive every time you see the person, read a Facebook message, or remember the offense. Pour over the Scripture that He shows you from this blog and other resources knowing that He wants you to be free not just during this Holiday Season, but in the year to come as well.

Seeking Hearts Ministries

My Story

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Lesson Four – No Such Thing as Limbo Land

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encouragement, faith, joy through transision, leap of faith, learning to live with transition, limbo land, transition

Back in May, I began to share lessons I was learning through this season of transition for our family. We started with Lesson One  which discussed how activity in any ministry doesn’t necessarily indicate life. Then, Lesson Two  talked about how no parent is perfect. Then finally, in Lesson Three we discussed how to get through a tough time with grace instead of white knuckles. I’ve learned many more lessons, but God put writing about them on hold, until now.

“Limbo Land” is not my favorite place to be. As I have often written, I am a “road map kind of girl”. Even though I am content (mostly), in this season of rest and revitalization, the transition has been longer than I expected. Even though I am currently involved in a local church (and loving it), I’ve known the whole time that it’s not our permanent place of ministry, so it’s been hard to jump in with both feet. It’s a joy, but it still feels like Limbo Land.

What I’m learning though is that there is really no such thing as Limbo Land. I am learning that every step with my Savior is a step to be savored.  Every season (temporary, or more permanent) has its own rewards and its own lessons.

Lesson Four is a constant battle for me. I like arriving. I like getting to where I’m going, but what is helping me through this season is the realization that when I feel like I’m in Limbo Land, I’m actually in the middle of a leap of faith. And, you know what? Leaping is fun.

Remember jumping on a trampoline, or hopping across a creek when you were little? The thrill wasn’t in the landing, was it? It was in the air. I am not an adrenaline junky, but even I have to admit that the excitement was when there was nothing under my feet. Whether I was on a trampoline, jumping into a swimming pool, or bouncing off a couch, the fun was in the air.

So…lesson four…there is no such thing as Limbo Land. I’m simply in the air, with a big smile on my face, excited to land into the next ministry knowing that my Savior is not just on the other side, but in the air with me every step of the way.

Seeking Hearts Ministries

*Photo by Bar-barella